Journal 4.
February 13th, 2023
With it being February, relationships are not only at the forefront of my mind but most people's minds. Whether good, bad, or indifferent, it is on our minds, and I wanted to share my insights on this topic because wisdom is welcomed wherever it comes from. Not only is it about the liaison between significant others, but we can reflect on all the relationships that we as humans have during this time; at least that is what I do. I know people who are single during these types of holidays, at some point or another feel a little sense of longing for someone, whether you admit it or not is your call, but I would not believe you if you told me that it did not cross your mind and it is normal for this to happen because we all want our person, it is natural, it is why we’re here. Each of us comes from thousands and thousands of years of relationships between people. That is something our ancestors had a great understanding of, and as a Norse polytheist, this is something that I am beginning to fathom myself. Humans from thousands of years ago took any type of relationship seriously and they were respectful to others. Today people lack the acknowledgment that they have the responsibility of becoming the very ancestor that we come from and as a result of that, there is a big decrease in meaningful relationships taking place. I think serious attention needs to be paid to this topic.
One attribute that I think is one of my greatest, is the ability to learn from other people's experiences, instead of having to go through it myself. Throughout the years I have seen all kinds of relationships, most of them were good at first but then a gradual decline took place till it eventually ended; and most that I have seen ended because there was a change taking place on one or both sides, and the individuals haven’t figured themselves out yet. Two things are guaranteed throughout life: change and death, which can sometimes be one in the same thing. We all have different ways of processing things that occur throughout life and I think that is where the conflict sparks. I’m seeing more judgment for how they go about it rather than witnessing them support each other through it. Don’t try to reprogram them to process information the same way you do; it’s not going to work. Instead, just listen to them because chances are they’ll tell you what they want from you during that time, if they want advice, give it to them respectfully, if they want to be alone for a while, honor them by giving them space. So on and so forth, you get it. Support them by having a true understanding of what they need or want from you. However, I know that’s a little hard when there’s no communication. This is why communication is quite literally the key to any relationship. Communicating builds trust and forges a stronger bond. We have to communicate, no one is a mind reader despite what people might think. And when communication takes place, try to have an open mind and make sure to understand, not just listen. If you have questions then ask, but if the answer isn’t matching with your mind, be patient while you two figure it out. Remember, it takes two to tango.
Lastly, please understand that perfect does not exist; that being perfectly imperfect is a good thing, and that has to be accepted. For those who are riding solo, take the time to focus on yourself. Figure yourself out, learn the importance of self-love, and accept that you are the only thing you have full control over. You can’t be capable of loving someone else if you don’t even love yourself, it’s cheesy, but it’s true. To those who have that someone, be proud and honored to have that feeling that many people are looking for, take pride in having that someone to come home to, be thankful that you have a shoulder to cry on, and bask in the joy of being loved because, at end of the day, that is all that really matters.
Peyton.
